I have never been a fan of the Binky. Although if I have to choose it over a thumb, I love them. The reason I hate them is due to mindless parents who let their kids suck on them until they are 10. So when my Daughter turned 2 and was still very attached to her Bink, I began to plot its removal from our lives. We have tried many things. We have realized that she has a stash somewhere and whenever we take one away she replaces it with another. The Binky Garbage people came and took them away but she found one. We stopped letting her have them during the day and she found one. We tried presents, and she found one. So when my husband said she slept with out it for a full day I went on the war path and found them all. We went cold turkey. We didn’t speak the word we acted like they never existed. Nights were bad and naps where worse. She would scream for Quinton to bring it to her. “Quinton where is my binky at?” “Quinton I want my binky” “Quinton” “QUNTON!!”
So Last night we pull out all the stops. I downloaded lullabies off of itunes. I fixed her glow worm and a miracle happened. She fell asleep in seconds. Thank you JESUS!!!
So all is good Right. WRONG! We forgot something. Something very very important to this whole story. Something that could destroy all we have worked for these last 4 days. Something Named Quinton. You see Quinton doesn’t understand that if Lilya sees a binky, hears the word binky, or even senses a binky, all will be lost. Quinton knows that Binkies make the little sister very very happy. They make her scream with glee and love the brother. So when Quinton found a binky in the car tonight he didn’t think of Mommy and her sanity. No he thought “This little pink sucky thing is going to get me in good with that cranky binky deprived toddler over there.
So imagine with me for just a moment feeling the triumph of finally removing the bink from the baby and turning to my right and seeing the retched thing sticking out of her mouth. DEAR GOD WHY DOST THOU FORSAKE THEE!!!!! As I was tearing all of my hair from my scalp Lilya was sitting in her Car seat grinning from ear to ear thanking her brother for the wonderful gift that had some how miraculously reappeared from oblivion. I spent the next hour trying to steal it from her.
I have a thought long and hard about these instruments of parental terror. THEY ARE FROM SATAN! Yes Satan. They show up all cute and trendy and they sooth and comfort you babies and cause you want to by more and more of them just in case you miss place them. Parents hide them in their cars, purses, homes, RV’s, Office, and hand them to family, friends, and even strangers to keep on them just in case Mom or Dad can’t find one of the million they have hidden all over the state. Parents leave 2,3, or 10 in the crib so the kid can easily find one in the night. The are innocent and cute until the moment we decide it is time for them to go. Then they TURN ON YOU. The binky companies rule the world. WE NEED BINKIES ANONYMOUS. We need binky legislation. Heck forget that I’m going to go buy stock in NUK and let Lilya suck on a bink until she is 50.
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